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 Todays parents and teens.

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Coach
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PostSubject: Todays parents and teens.   Tue May 17, 2011 10:34 pm

Why is it that parents these days would rather act like their child's friend rather than be the person who sets the rules and enforces them? As a middle school teacher, I see teenagers who have no problem with talking back to an adult as if they were their equals. I think that respect is a 2 way street but I have a tough time respecting a 13 year old who thinks that I owe them something.
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PostSubject: Re: Todays parents and teens.   Tue May 17, 2011 10:46 pm

OMG! Drives me nuts too! I know what you mean about the talking back...I don't let my neighbors kid talk back to me but then I see the kid smack talk his own mother and I want to slap him! Do we blame it on political correctness? The belief that kids are people too? People yes, adults...NO!18 years goes by fast. You can be friends with your kids when they become adults.

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PostSubject: Re: Todays parents and teens.   Tue May 17, 2011 10:56 pm

Being in a school with 500 12-14 year olds, I see the whole spectrum. Most of the kids are great but the disrespectful ones come from homes where the parents feeling guilty about being divorced or guilty about working so hard that they're not around...but in any case...they want to be nice to their kids so the kids learn that it's OK to talk back to all adults starting with their parents and then all the rest and don't fear any consequences.

That is of course until they talk back to COACH!!!
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PostSubject: Re: Todays parents and teens.   Tue May 17, 2011 11:01 pm

I always come down to thinking about Hillary Clinton years back when she was promoting, "It takes a village to raise a child". When I was a child, that's the way it was. The neighborhood parents looked after all the kids in their area and there was NO talking back to them if they corrected you. I'd love to see those days come back.

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PostSubject: Re: Todays parents and teens.   Tue May 17, 2011 11:07 pm

Now the statement should read "It will take the village's taxes to take care of this child in jail when they're older".
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PostSubject: Re: Todays parents and teens.   Tue May 17, 2011 11:13 pm

Funny but too sadly true. I'd rather we just help to keep all kids from becoming delinquents.

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PostSubject: Re: Todays parents and teens.   Tue May 17, 2011 11:20 pm

That's my goal everyday, but occasionally I'll read the local arrest log in the newspaper and see a former student and will always wonder, "What else could I have done". I take it personally as a failure to do my job. I know that's not the case, but I set the bar pretty high for myself. Sad
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PostSubject: Re: Todays parents and teens.   Wed May 18, 2011 12:14 am

Wow Coach. That is a mighty high bar when you have to fight environment and parents who don't put a lot of attention into their kids. Remember, you only have them a few hours a week.

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PostSubject: Re: Todays parents and teens.   Wed May 18, 2011 12:43 pm

I saw this on my Facebook wall. Apparently this is this guy's parenting skills.............

Charles J.- I didn't know this either... The kids at work made up a dance called the "chuggie"... i allow them to pick on me as long as they are not acting up!

So this is how one keeps their kids inline...."Don't act up and I'll let you disrespect me and make fun of me" Rolling Eyes

So what the kids learn is, it's OK to make fun of parent and adult and well what the heck, why stop there? Make fun of everyone! Neutral

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PostSubject: Re: Todays parents and teens.   Thu May 19, 2011 11:27 pm

A lot of adults let the kids act out and they think it's OK as long as they're not causing trouble. I know as a fact that when I see former students they thank me for putting them in their place. Even though they didn't like it then, they understood and respected my reasons now. I try to find the line between being friendly without being their friend...if that makes any sense. scratch
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PostSubject: Re: Todays parents and teens.   Fri May 20, 2011 1:42 am

Yup, I understand friendly without being a friend. I had teachers like that. The thing a lot of parents have trouble with is the fact that kids actually like guidelines and rules. If kids were meant to do their own thing, they wouldn't have parents.

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PostSubject: Re: Todays parents and teens.   Sat May 21, 2011 1:02 am

Example:

Take a 5 year old to an amusement park and say, "OK go ahead and I'll see you in a couple of hours!". The child doesn't know what to do and needs guidance. It's like that in the real world too. Unfortunately when they become teenagers, they do think they know everything so the conflicts start. It's how you handle those conflicts that builds mutual respect.
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PostSubject: Re: Todays parents and teens.   Sat May 21, 2011 1:06 am

Quote :
It's how you handle those conflicts

BEAT THEM INTO SUBMISSION!!! Laughing

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PostSubject: Child Discipline   Wed Sep 14, 2011 4:28 am

Coach wrote:
A lot of adults let the kids act out and they think it's OK as long as they're not causing trouble. I know as a fact that when I see former students they thank me for putting them in their place. Even though they didn't like it then, they understood and respected my reasons now. I try to find the line between being friendly without being their friend...if that makes any sense. scratch

I get what you mean. It's sad that most kids this days do not even have a clue what it means to respect their elders. I actually saw a parent once smiling affirmatively when her 3 year old daughter remarked something I consider rude to an adult in a grocery store, she probably thought it was cute for a toddler to be saying that. That's the problem with most parents, they think it's okay for their kids to be expressing their thoughts even if it's downright hurtful for other people to be hearing them. Avoiding stressful confrontations with their kids are more preferable to them, as long as their kids didn't cause any trouble.
Being friends with our kids should be only up to a certain level wherein they should also be aware of their parent's authority and house rules. Discipline should always be applied but try your best to explain why you're doing so. Kids need to learn the value of respect from their own parents and not wait for others to discipline them.
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